Short of it: More resistance. We've settled on passive resistance. Lots of not doing what the therapist asks and just calmly waiting her out. She always wins. Usually after about three to five minutes of them both calmly waiting and her reminding him of what to do, he'll finally open his mouth.
BUT it's still a battle of wills. And it's still taking a toll on him. So he, in turn, takes a toll on everyone and everything else. Before his first therapy session he hit a little girl whose only crime was that she was trying to be his friend. After his first therapy session he was in a very destructive mode, ruining another little girl's puff ball ghost (luckily she neither noticed nor cared -- and truth be told, the child life specialist had done most of the work on it) and throwing every piece of paper within his reach. He was in the middle of a tube feeding at this point, so when he'd destroyed everything else, he zeroed in on hitting the tube. Over and over and over again. ALL abilities to self-regulate and do what was right seemed to be gone.
I removed him from the play area for a nice long quiet time in his room. We turned the lights low and focused on his favorite toys. That helped keep the destruction to a minimum. I kinda cried. By "kinda" I mean I sobbed.
And then tonight I PRed on a 5k. I was not running a race. Just me running for myself. And it helped.
I am not a seasoned runner and I always run slow. But I have to run a little this week, because I'm running a marathon this weekend. I'm glad I had to run because of how much it helped me relieve stress.
J's journey has been and (through feeding therapy) will continue to be a metaphorical marathon. As we hit hard days, it's good to remember we're not alone in our struggles, and it's good to work to help benefit other people. Oh yeah, and it's good to run. Because it helps with stress.