Sunday, January 5, 2014

Weather -- My internal trialogue on bad winter weather

I wrote this just over a month ago for another crowd.

Given the recent crazy weather in the United States these days, I thought I'd post it here for a broader audience.  I am a Michigander these days, but that doesn't mean my North Carolina and Minnesota sides don't duel sometimes.

Stay safe!


I had to go out on the roads this morning. My Minnesota and my North Carolina had a talk with my Michigan. The internal trialogue went something like this...

NC: This is HORRIBLE weather! NO ONE should be out in this weather! 
MN: Yeah, yep. This is a Minnesota winter alright.
MI: But, wait, where's the lake-effect snow? Light, fluffy, easy to make snow balls out of?
MN: Sorry, MI. Looks like we're all confused over here. This is a Minnesota snow. Complete with the prairie winds.
NC: We should STOCK UP! The grocery stores are going to be all out of MILK!
MI: Um... after we left the land of BBQ, most of us went vegan... did you forget?
NC: We should STOCK UP! The grocery stores are going to be all out of ALMOND MILK!
MN:That's one way not to have to worry about gettin' out to milk the cows. Who ever heard of milking almonds?
MN: Yep. Bad weather. Sounds reasonable. But you do know that normal people don't raid grocery stores, right?
MI: Passive-aggressive ignoring. Not clear who it is direct toward. MN thinks MI is just really worried about the roads. Good to drive slow. NC just continues to glare.
NC: but this IS bad weather, right? I mean, three cars in the ditch in 500 yards -- that's bad even up here, right?
MI: Yep.
MN: Yabetcha.

All three then agreed to a shopping trip where the inner-Laura reigned and lots of comfort food was purchased. Soups. Lots of soups. Pasta. More soups. Spinach. Pinto beans. Pizza. Pizza sauce. Bread to be warmed in the oven. And more soup. No milk, almond or otherwise. My North Carolina lost that fight. We then drove slowly home and the trio of voices in my head melded into just one voice: mine. Wanting to snuggle into some warm slippers and take a nap. Because no matter which state you are from, this is some frightful driving weather!

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